EMILY RUTLEDGE, YOUTH MINISTER
“There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit distributes them. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working, but in all of them and in everyone it is the same God at work.” -1 Corinthians 12:4-6
Three weeks ago we had our annual Fall EYC Retreat. Each student was asked to pick a block on a very large canvas and fill it completely. It will hang in our new space as a touchstone of our community at this time. Unique, gifted, and beautiful. Each block is splendid and intricate but when put together as a whole--breathtaking.
Last weekend I led a workshop at our high school diocesan retreat on body image. We began by brainstorming all the ways we are told our body should be. A list emerged that looked something like this, Women: thin, curvy, tall, short, muscular, toned, soft, clear skin, no ‘oddities’, great hair that is both curly and straight on alternating days, a gap between your thighs… and, don’t wear clothes that are too revealing but don’t be too covered up. Men: ripped everywhere, not too muscular that it’s creepy, smell good all the time, don’t smell too much that it seems like you are trying, and have great hair. Also be very tall, except not over 6’5. And although it is not on the outside: everyone should be funny but not too funny it is annoying.
Please note: healthy was not once mentioned.
I’d love to think that we move past these expectations as adults but I am confident we do not. We have to work past them. It reaches far beyond our bodies into our careers, families, homes, and social lives. We create a standard in our minds that is a mishmash of media, expectations, other peoples’ lives, and our own desires to create a chupacabra of goals. The expectation we have for each facet of our existence can mirror what a teenager (and adult) is told their body must be: curvy, thin, tall, short, muscular, and smooth aka…impossible. We forget about the one thing we should hope to be: healthy.
Healthy in our lives looks like living into our gifts. When we are being true to ourselves and living our lives sharing the gifts that God has given us we are our best selves, not a manipulated version of a mythical self we have dreamed up. Living into our own gifts means that our lives do not mirror the lives of our siblings or our friends or our parents. Living into our God-given gifts means that we work to discover the few things that inspire us and bring Light to the world through us… then WE DO THEM. When we each begin owning our gifts; unique and beautiful, and stop comparing them to other’s gifts, but instead stand side by side shining light into the darkness together, we become something breathtaking.
