I'm a cradle Episcopalian. There is not a time I can remember my life without church on Sundays and the social circle I was wrapped up in being made up of the people that sat around me in the pews. I grew up going to an open and breezy church in Kailua, Hawaii. The sides of the church were sliding door which were wide open during services so that the trade-winds and small children could easily pass through. My childhood priest was a dad of two children my age and wore his softball cleats under his robe on Sundays our church team had a game. Church was home to me so it is no surprise that when my last year in elementary school imploded because of bullying and my struggles with anxiety it was Church that supported both my mother and I. Through all the ways that God does Her thing... I ended up with a scholarship to the Diocese of Hawaii's Episcopal all girl's school, St. Andrew's Priory. The Priory was a place where I learned the power that I held, my worth, and that launched me into the world empowered and loved.
Unbeknownst to my 11 year old self, while my life was imploding in 6th grade so was the Diocese of Hawaii. I heard hushed conversations about it at church and with parents but it never registered much to me. The idea of a Diocese, of a larger church, of anything past my home parish wasn't real or important to me. All I know, to this day, is there were money issues and the then Bishop stepped down and left a big old financial mess.
So there I was, the Fall of 1996, a new Priory girl with loads of anxiety and a little bit of hope. Our school was on the same property as the Office of the Bishop and the Cathedral. Each day on my way to and from the bus stop I walked through the old buildings knowing that big important stuff happened there that had nothing to do with me.
A new bishop was being elected and there were lots of opinions and conversations. Ultimately, the the Rt. Rev. Richard Sui On Chang was elected. I distinctly remember people saying he was the right fit for the job. He would be able to pull the Diocese out of the financial ruin it was being swallowed up by. He had been the right-hand person to the Presiding Bishop, held lots of positions of importance in the National Church, and was a 'numbers guy'. He was elected for a purpose and because he had very specific skills when it came to money management.Do you want to know how to make a 7th grade girl feel ambivalent about an adult... call him a 'numbers guy'.
Little did I know that this 'numbers guy' would change my life.
He was a local boy, raised in Honolulu, and when he moved back to be our Bishop I know he did lots of numbers stuff and did all the financial magic that everyone had hoped he would do to get the Church to a healthy place (do y'all now see why I do not sit on the finance commission!).
I am sure all of that was really important to a lot of people. None of that was important to me.
Ironically there were very few Episcopalians in my Episcopal school. The Church continued to be my safe space and support so as I moved through my years at The Priory I began to cross paths with this Bishop guy... a lot. School events and a search for a new rector of my home church meant that this Bishop Chang fellow and I were seeing each other a lot. Always one to remember my name and the last conversation we had, Bishop Chang and his wife, Dee, seemed more like another member of the family than the person in charge of all the Episcopalians in my state. The big hat, the staff, the ring... I had to realize that he was a pretty important person but somehow it didn't sink in.
Bishop Chang saw something in me that I struggled to see in myself... worth. Bishop Chang did not see young people as up and coming church leaders but as leaders in the church NOW. He gave us positions on boards and a voice. He advocated for us, knew us, and supported us in a multitude of ways both as a group and individually. By the time I was in high school he had taken on the name Uncle Bish to the youth of our diocese. He attended national youth events with us, I became besties with his secretary, and in college during the summers I would work in his office. He is one of the people who taught me about ministering to teenagers and how much fuller and alive Church is when young people are fully engaged and empowered in it.
Bishop Chang showed me how to be a disciple of Christ. He loved fully and well, knowing people and letting himself be known by them. He didn't let any position of power take away from his calling and even in the midst of fixing a financial crisis he found time to love and mentor, advocate and empower others to find their place in the Kingdom. One of my adult chaperones to the Episcopal Youth Event in Wyoming was an amazing and openly gay man. At the time he was in seminary and spoke to me about the things happening in the Church regarding Bishop Gene Robinson and how his own path to ordained ministry was not a smooth road. Bishop Chang was this man's mentor and ordained him. Uncle Bish was past discussing who was 'in' or 'out' of the Kingdom and was clear to our whole diocese that EVERYONE IS IN.
Last week, after a short illness Bishop Chang died. Two friends called to tell me the news so that I wouldn't read it or find out on social media. They are both priests, married. One of those priests, Jar, was a year younger than me in school and was also mentored by Uncle Bishop, I actually think it was he who coined the name. His life was changed by the 'numbers guy', too.
You may not have a funny hat or huge ring or walk around with a shepherd's crook (if you do, more power to you), but you and Uncle Bish are really not that different. You have a set of skills the world needs. You may teach or build houses or do medical research or drive a bus. Those skills are important and will do lots of good but you also have this other thing... you have the love of Christ to pour out on everyone you come in contact with.
To be honest, I didn't really think being a Bishop was that big a deal until I left the Diocese of Hawaii and realized not everyone invites the Bishop to their wedding. Bishop Chang showed me that what is a big deal is how you treat people, how you listen, how you remember details and follow up. He taught me that the gates are WIDE OPEN for EVERYONE and it's our job to invite people in.
All are welcome.
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