Thursday, April 26, 2018

Generous Love. 4/22/18 The Rev. Kathleen M. Sturges




Can money buy happiness?  Maybe.  At least that’s what one study done several years ago concluded.[1]  In that study researchers took a group of people and surveyed them on how happy they were.  Then they gave everyone a small amount of money - up to $20. Half were told to spend the money on themselves and the other half were to spend it on someone else.  At the end of the day, the participants were again asked to rate their happiness and the results showed that those who spent money on others reported a much greater happiness boost than the ones who spent money on themselves.  

As a person of faith I believe the reason for this is that when we are generous, when we are doing something for the benefit of another we are living as we were created to live - that is, in harmony with the flow of God’s great and generous love.  A love that surrounds us.  A love that is being poured into us all the time.  And when we let it flow through us as it is intended to do, instead of holding it in and keeping it to ourselves, then we are in harmony with God’s love and experience a deep sense of well-being.

Our reading from 1 John speaks to this nature of this flow.  “We know love by this, that [Jesus] laid down his life for us--and we ought to lay down our lives for one another.”  Love begins with God.  And we’ve been loved from our beginning.  We are being loved right now by the love of God, the love that is God.  Love that is filling us even as I speak.  Maybe you can feel it, maybe not.  Our perceptions changes and feelings come and go.  That is why we have a need to know love “not [just] in word or speech,” as 1 John puts it, “but in truth and action.” So God reveals God’s love most concretely in truth and action by Jesus’ act of freely laying his life down for us.

And because we know this love we are called to let that love flow by laying down our lives for others.  Now there are rare occasions where we can be faced with the choice of literally laying down our lives for another - I think of the French police officer, a practicing Catholic, who last month traded his life for a hostage and was killed in that person’s place.  The reason it made the news is because it was so sensational.  Thankfully we are not faced with such crises very often or ever in our lifetimes.  And 1 John knows this for the writer goes on to show what a laying-down-one’s-life type of love looks like not just in extreme moments of sacrifice, but in the daily give and take of loving life by asking the question, “How does God's love abide in anyone who has the world's goods and sees a brother or sister in need and yet refuses help?”  Loving others in truth and action by laying our lives down in love means that we are to share or even give up some of the things we think we need so that others who really are in need might not be so. 

But perhaps I’m preaching to the choir here.  I suspect that most, if not all of us here, have already signed on to the idea of sharing, of serving, of sacrificing on behalf of others.  I certainly see it every day in countless acts of love that are done both in and beyond our community.  Yet I also see and know that many of us struggle.  Part of that struggle has to do with what love looks like, how does one lay down their life in love in particularly hard circumstances.  I hear questions like, “How do I love and help a friend who is ruining his life because he’s an alcoholic?” or, “Now that I have awakened to systematic racism, what do I do now?”  Or here’s something we all face almost every day if we drive around Charlottesville.  It’s the question, “What is the most loving thing to do when you’re sitting in your car at a red light and someone is standing right next to you asking for money?”

That question was actually posed at WAC (Wednesdays at COOS) last year when we had a speaker come from The Haven, a day shelter which provides various services to help people facing homelessness.   “What is the best thing to do when someone asks you for money?”  The room went silent because we all wanted to know.  What was striking, though, was that this homeless advocate, this “expert,” confessed that she too did not exactly know.  But she was emphatic about one thing:  that whether a person gives or not, there is one thing we should all do and that is don’t judge.  Although it was comforting to know that even she struggled with what to do I think we all would have appreciated an answer that would settle the issue once and for all.

But the reality is, is that life is full of complex situations where answers may never be clear.  Still God’s love never stops and we continue to be called to let it flow through us and to not hold back because we are unsure or afraid of being wrong.  I know whenever I feel as if I am groping in the dark in my attempts to love or, really, when I’m facing anything unknown there’s a prayer by Thomas Merton, a Trappist monk and mystic of the 20th century, that gives me hope and peace.  It’s entitled The Road Ahead and it goes…

My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think that I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it. Therefore will I trust you always…

Take heart for the desire to love others and please God does indeed please God.  When we are generous, when we share what we have with others, when we spend even a few dollars on someone else we experience a boost of happiness because we are pleasing God, we are abiding in God, we are letting God’s love flow freely in us and through us.  Today, let us continue to follow the way of love, the way of Jesus who is our good shepherd.  For as we do so we will find that just like it was for Jesus so it is for us, that laying down our lives in love turns out not to be the end of life, but the beginning of new life - a life more real and authentic, a life more meaningful and true - a life that brings the greatest happiness of all - God’s resurrection life. 


[1] https://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=88682320

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